selfishness and caretaking

So a few more themes in my life these days are selfishness and caretaking. I'm really good at taking care of others. I'm really good at worrying about other people's needs, and I often take care of the needs of those around me before I take care of myself.

I don't do a good job of balancing me and other, and I frequently put other first and then forget about me for long enough that at some point something flips and I switch into selfish mode...hermity alone time, not wanting to do things for others, and just wanting my needs met.

Finding the middle path is hard. I've been spending a lot of time in the selfish mode the last few days, and I am worried that I'm going to hurt people's feelings. I want to reach out, check in, but I don't because I don't want to take care of others feelings right now. I'm trying really hard to take care of me, and to take care of me in a way that has the least negative impact on the people I care about. One of the side effects of spending a bunch of time alone thinking...is doing a lot of thinking.